Here is a quote from it: ( Amen to this quote!!)
The reason aging people get "discarded" in America is that they don't take their rightful position as the continuing heads of their grown families. They suffer for this, and so do their children and grandchildren. We tend to blame the plight of the elderly on "Western society." "In Asia," we say, "parents and grandparents are revered and respected by their adult children." But in fact, we parents of grown children have no one to blame but ourselves. If our goal is to put in our time and do our parental duty until our kids turn eighteen and move out so that we can get on with our lives and devote ourselves exclusively to our own enjoyment and our own ambitions, then we deserve it when our children fail to listen to us or respect us or look up to us - and when they begin to see us as a burden that they may have to take care of.
Somewhere along the line, here in America, we have come to the common narrow notion that family means parents and the young children who live with them, and that once the kids move on to their own families, parents should let them "have their independence" by getting out of the picture. Thus we give up and walk away from the role we ought to play for the rest of our lives - the role that will help our children most and that will preserve our own dignity, respect, and happiness - the ongoing role of parent, advisor, grandparent, and family head. We also give up priceless opportunities to learn from our children, share their lives, and enjoy their friendship.
Empty-nest parenting doesn't mean we don't enjoy the greater freedom and flexibility that come with an empty nest, but it does mean that we continue to be involved and active as the heads of our families and that we develop new and mutually beneficial ways of interacting with our kids.
